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My Guide Assists me in the Most Beautiful Way

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WTXSage
Posts: 5
Joined: Sat Aug 05, 2017 1:39 pm

Unread post Sat Aug 05, 2017 5:59 pm

My guide, Aian, helps me channel (is channel the right word) insights within myself and memories from my childhood. Often times, the work is confusing, and I am not sure what I am supposed to be learning. But this one is in my top three most healing, educational, growth inspiring writings under his guidance. I wanted to share, in hopes this might be useful for anyone else.



To the man who molested me from the time I was three until I was five: Thank you for the chaos you implanted deep inside of me.

Thank you chaos, for growing so strong as I grew older.

To my mother who verbally and mentally abused me, who degraded and humiliated me: Thank you. Thank you for the self loathing and self doubt you imprinted upon my psyche.

Thank you for the chaos that grew so strong and combined with the self loathing and self doubt.

Thank you to the town who made me an outcast from the time I was a child, up until now. Thank you for the rejection and the self identity that there was something inherently wrong with me. That combined with the chaos and self loathing and self doubt.

To the “somebody's” of this town, who looked at me like I was garbage, who viewed me as less than human, who treated me inhumanely, thank you. Thank you for giving me the time in my life that I thought those things about me were true.

Thank you for the chaos and the humiliation and self loathing and self doubt and rejection and belief I was nothing. All of these things created pain. A pain that grew stronger and stronger and stronger the longer I believed all of these things and felt all of these things. Thank you to everyone who contributed in this pain.

I have heard people say, “If I could take your pain from you I would.”

If you tried to take even an ounce of my pain from me, you would be robbing me. You would be stealing the most precious parts of me. Because you see, it wasn't just pain from all of these things that lived inside of me. A spark lived in there too. And I always knew it was there. I never doubted it was there. It took me a long, long time to find it, but once I did, it knew exactly what to do. It intertwined with all of the pain, the entire lifetime worth of pain, and it became POWER. It turned all of that pain into power. And not the kind of power that makes you rich or a badass. But the kind of power that let's you see the most strung out, filthy, pathetic person laying in the street, and all you can see is beauty. The kind of power that let's you recognize a person who thinks they are nothing as the perfection that they are, and then show them that. The kind of power that shows people how to light their own fires. The kind of power that treats a child molester in prison with the same respect you would a judge. The kind of power that sees through people just like glass and can see the greed behind the corrupt preacher's mask. The kind of power that can see through people just like glass and see the love behind the drug dealer's mask. The kind of power who can see people who feel they are LESS THAN and take their hand, and show them the things they believe about themselves are lies.
Thank you pain. You lied to me for a really long time and I didn't know that. But I think you wanted me to. I think you wanted me to know you were a lie because once I learned you were not even actually pain, but power, waiting to be used for the entire world, you knew I would do something with you. Thank you universe, for entrusting me with this tremendous gift of pain. Thank you universe, for believing in me enough to know I would learn what it was for. Guide me universe, because this is a tremendous responsibility and it is humbling. Thank you to all the souls on this earth who contributed to giving me the pain I needed so that I could manifest to do my job. Pain is power. All pain is power. Give me more, and I will struggle, and it will hurt, but that is how it works, to turn into power. I am getting stronger, and kinder, and my love for humanity grows and grows, the more pain I experience. And I am learning to manifest my pain very quickly. So this is a letter of gratitude, to my abusers, to my haters, to everything that has ever hurt me. Thank you for the fuel I needed to realize my pain is power. Because now that I know this, I know what pain is and what it's for. And there is a lot of pain in this world. And I am ready to tell the people they are not broken. They are not ruined. They are hurt because they are powerful. And I am ready to show them how to take the fuel of pain they've been given, and use it as their fuel to become real life superheros. Because that's what we all are anyway. Superheros. Love. Light. Thank you pain. Thank you life. Thank you spark. I'm ready to set some fires now. Let's go.

Thank you, Aian, for the guidance you give me to bring me to these realizations. Thank you for the gift of wisdom you give to me when we work together in my writings. For so long, I raged at the creator, “why me? Why did you put me here, with these people, in this place?” I remember now. I remember how this works. This one has been hard but not one of my most difficult.


Inhale

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Samanthaj
Posts: 983
Joined: Fri Apr 07, 2017 5:19 am

Unread post Sun Aug 06, 2017 3:30 am

If you tried to take even an ounce of my pain from me, you would be robbing me. You would be stealing the most precious parts of me. Because you see, it wasn't just pain from all of these things that lived inside of me. A spark lived in there too. And I always knew it was there. I never doubted it was there. It took me a long, long time to find it, but once I did, it knew exactly what to do. It intertwined with all of the pain, the entire lifetime worth of pain, and it became POWER. It turned all of that pain into power. And not the kind of power that makes you rich or a badass. But the kind of power that let's you see the most strung out, filthy, pathetic person laying in the street, and all you can see is beauty. The kind of power that let's you recognize a person who thinks they are nothing as the perfection that they are, and then show them that. The kind of power that shows people how to light their own fires.

Hi TXSage.... :welcome: to ABT.

It's great to have you join us all. Homebound and I were talking to you in chat earlier and we both admire your care and empathy for others. Now, reading this post.. I see even more and find your strength inspiring
Blessed be that person who looks down at those below them---- to help them up , and nothing less :o)

The world needs more with that love in their hearts, the fire in their souls...the ability to turn pain into strength and use it to help others :thinktank:

As you said in chat tonight... (along the lines of) Lights only grow brighter in darkness


And I am ready to show them how to take the fuel of pain they've been given, and use it as their fuel to become real life superheros. Because that's what we all are anyway. Superheros. Love. Light. Thank you pain. Thank you life. Thank you spark. I'm ready to set some fires now. Let's go.

^ I love this , it's inspiring. We all need reminding sometimes..to look how far we have come rather than looking ahead. There is a warrior within all of us. Totally agree
Whether our support for another is big or small... it still makes a difference.. a prayer, a kind word, a reminder, something to inspire.. or even just sharing your own story, as an example of healing and how it is possible


Thank you for sharing with us, take good care of yourself,

Samj
"Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think." - A. A. Milne

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CelticRose
Posts: 440
Joined: Mon Apr 03, 2017 2:32 pm

Unread post Fri Sep 01, 2017 3:12 pm

Gosh, I had tears come to my eyes as I read through this post. Please know that throughout all life trials and challenges that are sent to test us and our strength, inner strength most of all, that you will prevail and you are strong enough to cope with what life sends your way. Nobody is alone in this world, there are always genuine friends who will step forward when others step back, continue on inspiring others with your journey and gratitude that is always heard and received by those that watch over us. Peace & Blessings be with you and yours.
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Stargazer72
Posts: 29
Joined: Mon Sep 25, 2017 9:40 am

Unread post Sun Oct 01, 2017 3:22 am

That was beautiful! You have a beautiful guide!
"Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple." Dr. Suess

frangossy
Posts: 6
Joined: Thu Oct 12, 2017 1:37 pm

Unread post Sun Oct 15, 2017 6:05 pm

WOW i'v never read anything as powerful as this!!

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TheRaptureofEnoch
Posts: 67
Joined: Fri Jul 07, 2017 2:02 am

Unread post Tue Oct 17, 2017 6:21 pm

Oh, god... You vibrate so close to me regarding all of this. When you awaken from all of the power that people like this bestow into you from their lack of control you eventually realize that it builds you up.

My first memory is being shaken and thrown as a month-old infant. I won't go into the rest of the pain, misery, and failed suicide attempts...

Eventually even I became an abuser. Once it came full circle I realized that when you push energy in others by abusing them, you lose it from yourself. You become weaker by hurting others. When I sat behind bars, when I turned myself in, at the mercy of a cold system who cares about nothing I realized that all of this was meant for me. I felt love from my higher self to give me all of this hardship.

We serve one another. The darker and deeper we go into chaos, the more we can relate with every person we lock eyes with. It's a blessing to survive; and to share all your passion with others to guide them toward self-sufficiency.

From a fallen angel to a fallen angel. May we guide our offspring to the knowledge of love and willpower.

*breathes* Part of me wants to apologize on behalf of the people that harmed you, but I don't know the people that you've harmed either. This cycle eventually goes full circle. If you fight it, it eventually catches up to you. When you accept your punishments without feelings of disassociation, you are loved by your higher self for the honesty.

Be true.

Pain is a signal for change. Pleasure is a signal for concentration. Hedonism is a language of our collective soul.

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